uncertain journey…

20110520-074907.jpgI wonder how much energy I waste on trying to glimpse beyond the God-mist in my life? By this, I mean being willing to be faithful in following God out to wherever he’s leading me, but wanting to know the destination, rather than being content in the journey. I suppose that could be the picture I’ve been having recently, of the road curving away from me, where you can’t see where the road is heading, but you know it’s heading somewhere.

This seems to call for a trust in God that accepts the impossibility of knowing the outcome. In other words, not expecting a certain result because we’ve heeded the call and therefore ‘deserve’ some kind of reward. On reflection, all that Jesus told the disciples is that they’d be fishers of men – he left out the rest abut what the next few years together would look like, including the inevitable climax of the story. He didn’t really give them any hints and clues about what would happen after he had gone, other than the immediate good news that they couldn’t wrap their heads around. There doesn’t seem to have been much of a grand strategy (the Great Commission is a little blurry on detail!) , a scheme, other than going where the Spirit called – and what seemed to be the right thing to do. Obeying the ‘siren call of the dangerous God’, as someone much more lyrical than me described it (Geoff Ryan, to be precise).

As I look forward to teaching, there’s much that I’m uncertain about. Not least what happens after my training year. But that, I suppose is the adventure of following. Focusing too much on the destination robs us of the reward of the journey…

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